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Princessa
Yours Truly  Rara Alqadri |
Man Of Life
Boyfriend  Eric Heng Kun Fa My Heart & Soul
| Affiliates
Kickass ♥Fidah ♥Sis iiCa ♥Fana ♥Wani ♥iLa ♥zAiNuRiAh ♥KhAdIjAh ♥Ashraf<3<3 ♥Fuad ♥Eka
Tuesday, February 17, 2009
when i wake up tis morning, i told myself that today wud be the day in which i try not to text or call Hym. And no, i'm not referring to Mohd Husaini. and its not even 10am yet, i almost wanted to call Hym once and text Hym twice. but i managed to stop myself. its quite easy actually. i just have to think of the girly companions he have at work. tat wud be enuff to make me jealous and i will not wan to text or call him. but, to tell u the truth, it is emotionally difficult for me. my hp wud be on total silent mode and i will be checking it every few seconds only to get dissappointed coz theres no sms from Hym but from sumone else. haiz.. was on the phone wif him last nite from 2332pm till 0038am. the weird thing was i was already extremely tired and was almost ready to go to sleep. i did not pick up any kols from the other guys and even rejected Mohd Husaini's calls. but, when he call me to ask me to call him back, i was totally wide awake. i called him back even tho my prepaid was getting low. haha. and the conversation with Hym, was fun tho, there was jokes in between and also awkward silences between us. there was a time when he talk abt his girly companions and yes, it hurts me and there was the jealousy pangs. but what do u expect me to do rite? so i juz played along n smiled n laugh. but deep deep inside, all i wan to do is cry. haha. serves me right i guess. it was my fault from the beginning. another reason for me to be quiet, is because he said i am egoistic. ok, maybe i am. but i did apologize to him a gazillion times to which he juz bt bodoh. haha. and he also said that he rather admit defeat and be quiet. so, i guess i'm learning from Hym. i am admitting defeat as in i noe i wont get Hym bk, even if i shed bloody tears. i will try my very best to be quiet today n so on and so forth. but then again, i noe myself. sooner or later, i will still be the one texting or calling Hym. its not tat i dun wan to be strong, but my heart really cant take another blow. and it seems he doesnt mind that i dont text or call Hym. i do hope he will either call or text me today. coz i really, really miss Hym.. Maybe, just maybe, i shud go back to Mohd Husaini.. but that will mean, i'm just plain stupid. well, maybe I am..
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